| 12~30~99 |
| Call it synchronicity, coincidence, or strange simultaneous
transcendental humours and it still chills the marrow. Before the
coffee is done brewing and therefore well before the first luscious black
drops can pass my lips and massage my tongue with its heat, I hop online
and begin reading. From the Yahoo 'What's New' section I see a report
from Reuters of London that ex-Beatle, George "the quiet one" Harrison,
had been stabbed in his own home.
"Christ," I thought, "Some guy actually works up the balls to go to action and stab someone, this was in England otherwise Harrison would have been shot to death, and he picks George Harrison." Why George? Why in his home? I can make a list of thousands of millions of people long that could use a healthy knife wound in the chest and Harrison just isn't worthy of a place on it. That's good for him in case I ever do make the list and proceed to stab thousands of millions of people. Actually, I'm in America where I can get a gun, a much more expedient weapon when it comes to violent rampages. Apparently George is doing okay and the knifeman is in police custody. This news was interesting enough on its own, but when I clicked my way onward, the very next article I stopped to read was a National Geographic piece on biodiversity that said, "Human actions are threatening every kind of creature, from bears to birds to beetles." Beetles people! [sic] Beatles! Eerier than an assload of y2k bugs in my opinion. Speaking of which ... Yesterday was my first day of contact with EarthLink customers. It didn't take long for the trouble shooting prowess developed earlier in my life to come flooding back in on me. Their was a tone in the voices that hinted of a lack of enthusiasm on the customers parts, a tone I had never heard before because normally these pathetic creatures are so upset and excited over the smallest glitches that they will swear and curse your mother or erupt in a torrent of unashamed tears over the server returning an invalid response. "Oh, Lord! Why hast thou with thy invalid responses forsaken me!? Boo- Hoo!!!" It is to them akin to praying and having their prayer packets lost by God in the shuffle. So why the 'I barely give a fuck' attitude of the people yesterday? My theory is they believe their computer is going to be as useful as 4 megs of ram on a 386 running Windows 98 following the stroke of midnight tomorrow, and for all I really know they may be right. Just because y2k paranoia has quelled to a jokable level doesn't mean it still isn't relevant and serious. I'm pretty sure the power will go out if but for a minute or two. The calls today should take on a panicky tone. The nutcases are sure to crawl out of the microsoft works with an astrological hodge-podge of fearful queries. As I see it nobody will put up with not being able to get online for more than a day or two before death threats are made, presidents assassinated, and lawyers called on by bicycle couriers who will be essential for communications. Want to make a buck. Lube your chain and test your gears and get ready to offer your services to some over-bloated jack ass with too deep pockets that you will be his personal bike courier after y2k, but you need money up front to assure that you won't courry for somebody else. Tell him all the execs are getting couriers and at $550 a day your among the most reasonably priced. One more day to go.
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