I shouldn't joke around about being unemployed. There are hundreds of thousands of jobless Americans out there and I am one of them once more. It was the heroin. I didn't want to be a temp. at an outservice corporation anyway. I know that's the cry of one who loses something is, "I didn't want it anyway," but in this case I realy didn't. I'm working in paint to recreate the drawing that got me relieved from duty. If I find out how to transfer a paint.doc into a .gif or .jpg, then I'll put it online, but until then use your imagination.

I came into work at 2pm like I did for every other day of training. At 5pm, the Russian that gives and makes out schedules at TeleTech came into the training room and assigned everyone perfectly hideous, Siberian Concentration Camp schedules. He read them in his thick Russian accent, "Evenor, 2pee-emm to 8 pee-emm, Tuesdays off. Reechurd, 6 aye-emm to 12 pee-emm, Tharsdays ov." And on and on he went like a judge handing down sentences to convicted felons.."Ahn-ree-kay, Ight aye-emm to two pee-emm." 6 a.m. to noon? Every fucking day except Thursday? No. Unacceptable. And as the bees started swarming in my skull, the trainer came over to my seat and said, "The Select representative needs you in her office." I get up and go to the office. And I have a pretty good idea why.

"TeleTech asked me to relieve you from the contract,"she said, pausing briefly in sympathy, "and do you have a pretty good idea why?"
I responded glumly dead-panned,"Is it the heroin?"
The Select girl laughed and said that was it. She also told me Select would help to find me another assignment that had better hours. I don't need better hours. It's the hours, pay and lack of benefits combined that made the job at TeleTech the potential soul-crushing, make-you-feel-worth-less-than-the-broken- down-elements-your-corpse-is-composed-of kind of job.

Rather than bitch about how much TeleTech sucked and was depressing me, I subconsciously wrote things down on papers that would end up in the hands of management and get me fired. And speaking of writing in one's sleep, the X-files is in horrible need of help. A brain eating teenage ghoul who can't control his hunger? What happened to writing about stretchy liver eating guys who hibernate 30 years at a sittin' before craving more human liver? That's the stuff I liked. If you don't see the difference between those two story lines, the next time you're in the mood for a horror flick, rent "I was a Teenage Werewolf," starring Michael Landon rather than "Martin." Chris Carter and FOX should be showering money, souped up cars and whores upon Darin Morgan before it's too late which it just about already is. Next week Chris Carter gives fans a masturbatory "Flintstones meets the Jetsons" episode with cross over characters from 'Millenium' joining in on the Scully and Mulder fun. Better set your VCR!

Why should I bitch about the quality of T.V. writing? I saw "Sleepy Hollow,' and I'm not bitching about that mess of a screenplay. Maybe I forgive 'Sleepy Hollow' because the visuals and sounds overwhelmed the inane dialogue and useless flash-backs substituted for actual character depth of Depp's Ichabod. Maybe Depp's performance ate through the shottily sketched and senseless romance. Anyway, it was something if not the aforementioned that makes the movie well worth matinee price. Go see "Sleepy Hollow," at least it's better written than the shit you're reading right now, dumbass.

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